The End of America?

I think the end of the world is coming. People actually have started to call me Jesus. Knowing me that is really just scary, but how bad can it really be? Maybe I should use my resemblance of him to start a following. Like I can claim to be Jesus and have everyone else do things... crazy things... like lets say, PLANT TREES IN PEOPLES YARDS! Oh my! That is just pure insanity; I think I’d prolly have to tone it down a little bit.

I have always wanted to start a revolution but frankly I don't know what it would be for. Like sure, there are plenty of people who wish to destroy our government. (And they're not all Americans!) But they are all scattered in different groups, there are the Anarchists, the Nihilists, the Communists, and yes even the dreaded Green party! What we really need to do is figure out a good point that every one would back against, and if we can't find one then we get to make one up! Like let’s say... THE GOVERNMENT DOESN'T LIKE KITTENS! Okay now that we have this tasty little lie floating around we can just wait for all of the governments enemies to band together, because everyone likes kittens! So now we have a very large group banding against the government so now we just need to figure out the best way to take over... Well the Anarchists will team up with the Arsonists and burn down all the government buildings. The Nihilists will sit around and do nothing. The Hippies will grow weed to bribe government officials and also to boost our new economy. The Communists will distribute all the weed and firearms equally among the revolted. And I will prepare to ensure my space as the New Emperor Grand High Uber Czar (NEGHUC) of The New-Age and Really Extremely Giddy Associative Provinces of the Country Also Formerly Known as the United States of America. (NAREGAPCAFKUSA) As the NEGHUC of NAREGAPCAFKUSA I will create a new language give people roller coasters and make penguins our national animal.

Damn, I'm gonna love living in NAREGAPCAFKUSA. Who wants to help?